I was 17 when I had my first girl-crush. Did nothing about it, of course. Girls aren’t supposed to like girls. Not in THAT way, anyway. Getting over her took several years. I thought about her often, even as I went on dating boys. Eventually I figured out the best way to repress my most secret feelings and emotions. No, they were never again to resurface! Several years passed, until one dark and lonely day…the feelings returned. DAMN IT! My monster refused to be forever suppressed. She needed to breathe. She screamed and wailed and clawed her way out of the suffocating closet…clawed through my husband…my parents, siblings and closest of friends. Havoc wrecked left much spiritual debris along the creature’s path.
Then suddenly, when all energy had been spent and nearly the last breath exhaled, a somber monster transformed – while in solitude – into a most beautiful being. Self-aware, strong, and empowered I move forward. Never looking back. Never going back. My love for women mirrors my love for the universe.